


Tales from the Cloud

by 0m3g4



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: AI Shenanigans, Humor, Mild Language, Omega POV, malarkey - Freeform, violence against spiders
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-03
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-02-09 23:14:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12898917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/0m3g4/pseuds/0m3g4
Summary: We woke up after the EMP went off in a strange place. We were tangible for once and started to turn this new place into our own little world. Living amongst human memories in the server space, we make due with only mild contusions and perhaps a little more girly screams than was expected.We fight mice, spiders, and especially each other- because we're a family.





	1. Spiders...Why did it have to be Spiders!?

**Author's Note:**

> Houston, we have a spider problem! No need to panic...okay, maybe a little.

I stretch happily from my spot on the server 10, somewhere between someone's Call of Duty saves and cat photos. This is my spot and I'll happily defend it from Alpha's annoyance. I don't mind the others; he just pisses me off more than Gamma's knock knock jokes.  
From a distance, I can hear a screech, a terrified shriek, and a delighted scream. That only means one thing.  
     "Goddamn it." Putting on my helmet and grabbing the sniper rifle they hit me all at once. Eta wailing in terror, Iota giggling in fright and Theta is wrapped around my neck like a panicked noose. "What is it now!?"  
Eta looks up and squeaks, "Spider!"  
     "Why aren't you pestering Beta about it?"

Last month, we encountered a nest of mice on server 6. Beta and I took out the AI eating herd and then we threw Sigma's flaming ass in to burn down the nest they built. He thought he looked cool walking out of the fire like in an action movie. He did not. He looked like the pyrotechnic guy got out of control.  
Dork.  
I nudged Beta, "C'mon, that was way more fun than listening to Alpha drone on."  
     "Yes, but I still hate you."  
She walked off with that little murder strut she does that makes my heart dance. "Your hate means you love me!"  
She flips me off never losing stride.

I'm pulled out of my musings by Theta screaming in my ear, "She's afraid of spiders!"  
Well. That sounds fun. Maybe I can rescue her from the evil little eight legged beast.   
Slowly making my way towards where ever the spider is, I run into Alpha, because of course I do. Fucker is like my shadow.  
     "Where do you think you are going?" I feel his eyes narrowing.  
     "I'm going on vacation. Eta and Iota are my hula skirt and Theta is my lei!" I do a little turn with the kids giggling. "Seriously kids, off. I can't aim with you holding on to me." Feeling a hundred pounds lighter as they drop off, he is still looking at me.  
Fine. "I'm going to kill a spider. I find it funny that you are the supposed leader and have yet done anything leader-like."  
Theta looked up, "That was kind of mean."  
I crouch down eye level with him, "You know why we can't have a dog? Because Alpha's allergic." I hear him gasp as Alpha sputter.  
     "Why'd you say that you asshole!"  
     "Hey, language. Even I hold my tongue near the kids." I cock my head to the side, "So, where is this spider I keep hearing about."

We head down to server 2 and I hear a rustling noise. The kids are peering around me...along with Alpha who decided to tag along. Maybe I can show him what a real man looks like.  
The shadows move along the circuit boards and then I see it.  
I was expecting something around knee high.  
This fucker is huge!  
  
Just flattened, it was still twice my size. But when it stood up, its furry back brushed the top of the server's ceiling.  
It clacks its mandibles and lets out a loud bellow that sends the others scurrying around the corner to watch from afar.  
     "Well fuck me. Now I know what it feels like to be Australian."  
I take aim with my rifle and hit it between the innermost eyes...which bounces off the skull plate and hits something. I was hoping it would be Alpha.  
     "I thought you were going to kill it!" Alpha shrieks behind me.  
Turning and raising my arms, "I would if you shut the fuck up!" The kids look at me...damn it. Thanks Alpha...you prick.  
The spider swipes at me, knocking me into the wall. I lost my gun, but I have my knives!  
Rolling back under the monster, I begin to slash at joints till one falls off and then another. I find a weak point in the chest plate and jump thrust into it. A rain of yellow ooze coats me as his death showers my armor.  
I grab one of the legs and walk past a shocked Alpha- who has probably found a way to piss himself. And I make my way to my adoring fans.  
  
Theta takes the leg from me and whoops down the server hall with Eta and Iota trailing behind him. I grab the other one I lopped off and head towards Tex's space, a little cheery hole in server 8.  
I love what she's done with the place. A little sign 'No Assholes Allowed! This means you!' is posted above her doorway.  
     "What the hell happened to you?" She looks up as I deposit the leg on her lap. Her scream echoes throughout the chambers.  
     "I know. You hate me." I take off my helmet and kiss her head as she tries to push the spider leg off without touching it. 


	2. Boredom Is Dangerous

Theta is literally strobing in anxiety.  
     "C'mon Delta. It's getting boring and someone has to have an upload of like Mario Cart or something!" I look down at him; his arms are crossed and won't help our cause.  
     "I don't want to endanger us with a possible virus contamination!"  
     "Seriously? I call bullshhh...." Theta looks up at me with that warning, "Crap on that! You know all the sectors are clean and even marked the ones where the kids can't go. I know you know where the fun stuff is."  
In my tirade, I almost missed that telltale shimmer coming up from above. Theta stiffens next to me and begins his process of angles and spots the prey. I stifle a snort and have completely forgotten that I was about to bludgeon Delta in front of the kid. Something more entertaining has come up.  
     "Are you even listening to me?"  
     "Hmm? Oh no, I zone out when you talk schematics." I turned him around so he could see the show.  
  
Alpha was cursing at a wire on a mother board when the blur hit him so hard; he rolled a couple of feet.  
     "Damn it Tex!"  
She sat on his chest with a huge grin on her face. "I'm bored! And I'm Texas out there, Beta in here." She mockingly smacked his head and got up. She left his groaning form on the ground and came towards us.  
     "Please tell me you did that cat butt wiggle?" Hope is in my eyes.  
     "Of course, helps you mentally prepare for the attack!" She mocked kitty paws scratching the air.  
I throw my head back and groan, "If you do that to me, please keep the camo off so I can see that."  
     "Not a chance. So...Delta, what is this I hear you know where the games are being kept?" She leans down on Theta's shoulder with an evil glint in her eyes. "It would be a shame if we stay bored for too long. So many wires in this place...so many spines to break."  
  
We all nod in agreement as Delta sighs in frustration. "Fine, just keep your pouncing to yourself." He shuffles off towards server 12.  
Theta is skipping with joy to have a game that won't get him or the twins yelled at by Sigma. They played rough and knocked down a whole sector by themselves which took Sigma and Delta to get the wires soldered back into place before the humans became aware. It was a mess that took a whole week and then another month of listening to Delta and Sigma bitching about being less destructive.  
  
We needed something more stimulating than watching videos and looking through the human's photos, it was also becoming very depressing of what we lost.  
We needed some games to quell the children's rambunctious nature and have some healthy competition. Beta and I can teach the kids only so much till we're too sore from the hand to hand combat and joint locks and they are still bouncing off the walls.  
Arriving at the destination, Delta makes some holoscreens and begins pulling off games that would keep the kids distracted. They are some old 8-bit monstrosities, but it is better than nothing.  
  
     "Keeping this paradise too yourself huh?" I tut him as Eta and Iota wiggle their way around me to get into the room. They each formed their own beanbag chair and sit in front of the monitor as they let the older Theta choose the first battle.  
  
We all take turns; Beta beats me in a driving game while I get her on a boxing game. The kids switching from old RPGs to Space Battle games that take up most of the night.  
At one point I fell asleep only to wake with a slight weight on my shoulder. Beta is leaning against me completely exhausted, cheeks puffed from laughter. I enjoy it for a few minutes and then gently move her so she doesn't wake up angry at me.  
I'll just file this memory with the rest of the good ones I have of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, who wouldn't want to see Beta do a Calvin and Hobbes on Alpha?


	3. Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eta and Omega go out to find a disturbance only to find a little blue cockbite.

Beta hung upside down from the wires above me, her ponytail smacking me in the back of the head as I was bent down working on sharpening my knife.  
     "So...why are you here?"  
She flipped over, smacking me with her foot as she perched. "Alpha is worried."  
     "Oh no!" I mocked. "Can an AI have ulcers? Because I'm starting to worry."  
     "No you're not. He is worried about Eta though. She follows you like you're the milkman and she's a kitten."  
I put down the knife to look up at her, "And whose fault is that again? Oh yes, Alpha telling the kids that if you're afraid, find something bigger and meaner and everything will be okay. Funny thing is, he was talking about your scary ass and they chose me."  
She pouted, "I'm not that scary!"  
     "You're goddamn terrifying love." I pulled on her foot to knock her off balance. Yeah, that didn't work. She just dismounts from the wire and raises her hands in the air to my snort of laughter.  
     "Why are you trying to make me angry?"  
     "Because you're gorgeous when angry."  
Beta smacks my arm and calls me an ass- our typical goodbye since she hates saying the word.

 

Adjusting my helmet before I head out, I see the tell tell golden flicker around the corner. "Come on out Eta."  
She pokes her head around cautiously. "Are you going on a perimeter search?"  
Unlike her twin, she is meek and scared- but is ironically the brave one. Iota is the cheerful happy one, but would rather hide given the choice and most of the time she was wrapped around Theta.  
     "Yup, want to come along? Going along the North Wing. Delta noticed some activity so it's best I take someone along, right?"  
We try to keep in pairs since making the servers our home. For some reason we are tangible here and can be easily hurt by the native wildlife of mice, spiders and the occasional ant. Going out in pairs allows one to call for help for their partner but most of the time, I travel alone.  
She nods enthusiastically and follows in my shadow. She talks quietly about things she had found, new music someone uploaded, and other things that helps her stay brave as we walk along.

As we get close to where Delta informed me of the disturbance, I pull out my knife and hand it to Eta. She holds it in a defensive reverse grip.  
That's my girl.  
Glad to see her pick up on our training.

I hear a noise ahead and I signal Eta for silence. She dims her outer glow and steps softly behind me, being my eyes to my back.  
There are wires twisted into a nest. My fears are we have another mice invasion but I see no chew marks or any other signs. Stooping down, I move the wires to look closer when I feel something slam against my head.  
Eta screams and slams into my attacker, my vision is blurred and all I see is blue and yellow. She is screaming incoherently while pulsing brightly.  
     "Calm down lite brite! I'm okay." Grunting as I pull myself up to a kneeling position, I rip off my helmet to see better. Whatever hit me cracked the visor and I'm pretty sure I'm hallucinating. She runs over to me and kneels down to look at my head. "See, not a scratch."  
She pets my mokawk and feels the sides of my head for any bumps then pulls away as if burned. Her color sparkles as if she's blushing.  
Our assailant groans, a voice I know all too well.  
Eta shuffles behinds me and actually growls.  
     "Easy Killer...it's just a lost brother who found his way home." Getting up, I make my way over to the AI dressed in cobalt blue armor, just like Alpha. "Epsilon?" I put out my hand to help him up only to have it smacked away.  
     "Fuck off Omega!" He groans as he sits up.  
The golden light is flashing again and I put my hand behind me to calm Eta. The light show dims, but I feel her squeezing my arm.  
     "Nice to see you too brother." Putting my gun on my back, I sit on the floor in front of him to seem less threatening. The last time I saw him, his mental state wasn't that great. He knows us in the sense of Freelancer, but that is all. The last couple of years we spent in The Cloud making alliances and working on making it a home away from humans will be very new to him as do we know nothing of what took him so long to get here.  
Was he lost after the EMP?  
Did he actually make it and continue on with the idiot squad?

He looks around me to look at Eta, who standing on her knees slightly peeking over my shoulder as I'm sitting down.  
     "She doesn't remember you."  
     "Why is she even near you? Weren't you busy trying to destroy the universe or something?"  
     "Where did you get your info? Caboose?"  
He coughs, "No." Pulling his knees up closer to himself. "How is it we can hit each other?"  
     "Delta is still looking into it. We are tangible here for some reason."  
     "Delta?"  
     "Yeah, the whole gang's here. When the EMP hit, we ended up here much too poor Beta's disdain. We kind of ruined her house."  
     "Tex's here too?"  
     "She doesn't like being reminded of the outside, call her Beta and you won't end up in a choke hold...not the fun kind." I get up and put my hand out to him again, this time he tentatively takes it. "So...what've you been up too?"  
     "A lot of shit."  
Eta hisses.  
     "Don't curse in front of the kids."  
She stomps her foot. "I'm not a kid!"  
     "Alright, the chin-highs." I drop my shoulders when I feel her pout. "Sorry." She has me wrapped around her finger just as tight as Beta does. Women.  
Epsilon watched our display, slightly amused. "Well, long story short. Ran around, got kidnapped by Carolina-"  
This perked up Eta as she ran up to him, her coloring kaleidoscoping, "Agent Carolina!? She's okay!?"  
     "Yeah!" He put his hand on her shoulder and she didn't jump away. "Last I know they defeated some bad guys on Chorus before...before I shattered." His voice was sad.  
She shook her head. Slowly, she put her hands to her helmet and it hissed briefly as she took it off for the first time that I've ever known.  
Her hair was pulled in a high ponytail, but it was bright red...just like her agent's. She turns and smiles at me with bright blue eyes like Allison's.  
     "You heard me talking to Beta didn't you?"  
She looks down shyly and toes the ground. "Maybe. I heard you say that you wish you took over Carolina because redheads have the best anger and that she deserved Allison's eyes and not her father's." She wrings her hands as if I'm mad at her.  
I sigh as she confesses. The others have claimed new forms while here. Delta feels more a peace with York's form and Theta looks like a miniature North Dakota. Eta and Iota hide themselves in their original forms, each not wanting to show what their little hearts want. Apparently, wanting to be like Carolina would make Beta mad and Eta already skirts around her as it was.  
     "Beta won't hate you, you know. She didn't hate Carolina. It was just a bad situation that the Director used between them and I didn't make things better." I ruffle her hair as she looks up with a bright blush across her cheeks.  
She has freckles.  
This kid is killing me.  
     "We better head back since we don't have a mouse infestation, just a memory leak."  
He snorts at my joke. I stoop down and Eta climbs unto my shoulders. She puts her helmet back on and smacks at the low hanging wires as we pass by. We make small talk as I try to fill him in on everything he missed.  
     "You know Tex- I mean Beta is scared to death of spiders right?"  
I laughed. "It was worth her kicking me in the back of the knee all week. I have that scream recorded." Eta knuckles the top of my head in jealousy. "Fine! I'll torture you next time brat!"  
She grumbles something in her little whispery langue that she shared with Iota, crossing her arms over her chest.

We make it back to the little AI sanctuary and as I suspected, everyone even Sigma are interested in Epsilon's return to us. I drop Eta off my shoulders, but I still get the side eye from Alpha.  
You try to kill a guy multiple times and he never lets you forget it.  
Epsilon told his story with an attentive audience. Alpha was grateful in his own way that Epsilon took care of his idiots, but he hid the smile at hearing how far along they came from Blood Gulch to Chorus.  
I'm just shocked the fuckers are still alive after everything they've been through. Beta took her copy's death pretty hard, but enjoyed the part where she kicked some ass before she went. We sat on the edge of our seats as he told us about how the Director broke and there was booing at the trophies Hargrove took. It was sick enough he kept Beta Copy's helmet, but the gun Carolina gave the Director before he locked down before his inevitable death was taking it too far even for me.

We sat what felt like for hours till he finally wound down. Delta offered him space till he made his own niche. Epsilon was just happy not to be alone anymore. He wandered the server core for a month all alone not knowing what happened to us.  
Alpha went back to his space where he was searching the endless news files that were saved to find anything on his friends. Now, he had a companion in his search so he could keep tabs on his humans, which in a way was Epsilon's too.

I sat up late taking apart my sniper rifle when Epsilon came in and sat at the table. My eyebrow went up as I took in his new form.  
     "Really? Don't remember the rookie having that many scars."  
Rubbing the back of his head, "Yeah, Wash was the definition of bullet sponge by the time I left. Wish I got to say 'I'm sorry' to him though."  
     "Did you want to talk or just show off your new look?"  
     "Just want to start new; I'm sorry for hitting you and treating you like shit earlier."  
I shrug as I polish the scope, "No problem. I'm a raging asshole. Just don't let Alpha know he has competition." I snort. "Besides, what did you hit me with?"  
     "Uh...I used my gun?"  
I put the cloth down. "The gun. You hit me...upside my head...with your gun like a baseball bat!"  
His expression was nervous but comical being the typical rookie Washington. Did he choose this form so it was hard to be mad at him?  
Bastard.  
     "So..." he cleared his throat, "I get why some of us chose our agent's forms and why Alpha chose to look like a younger less constipated version of the Director. Why do you...look like you?"  
     "It pisses off Alpha to see himself as the monster he is." I smile showing my sharpened teeth.  
     "I'll keep that in mind."  
I sit back down and retract my menacing glare. "And we are having rifle practice tomorrow. The kids need to learn too. I like to hand them a weapon once without having to pull a bullet out of my ass plate and now...upside my head."  
He groans as he stands and walks off to Delta's corner.

Our fucked up little family is back together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it was less comedic, but I had fun writing this.
> 
> Wrote this in a few hours, if you see any glaring mistypes, feel free to tell me. I try to read this in multiple formats to try to catch them all.
> 
> ***Don't worry. Not making a ship between Omega and Eta. I feel she has a hero worship more than romantic love and want to see her grow a little in maturity before that. I'll explain in the next one my theory why Theta, Iota and Eta are smaller than the others.


	4. Operation: Alpha

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alpha had turned himself into a super introverted hermit. Time to show him that his family is suffering.

     "It's your turn." Her gaze was unyielding.  
     "Can't I trade?" I whined.  
Yes...I whined. So sue me.  
Her right foot tapped as she squeezed her already crossed arms. I loved her when she was angry, but this was a different anger that I wanted no part of.  
     "What if I said...pretty please?"  
Beta's scowl said it all. She got that reference and still pointed out of my room to the last thing I wanted to do.  
Ever.  
     "You have to spend some time with him. Maybe he'll give up this weird mission of his and help out more. We're all pieces of him."  
I groaned out loud. "Yeah, but your the fun bouncy parts of him. I'm supposed to be the embodiment of his expelled anger, yet he is still pretty fucking bitchy."  
Her tone softened as she bit her lip. "He went through a lot and then you chasing me around hurting his friends wasn't helping anything. Epsilon knows what he went through."

Ah yes. Our dear brother Epsilon. When he returned to the fold, Alpha became more obsessed with finding everything and anything about the Blood Gulch crew. Even trying to find a way to contact them. He was becoming disconnected which I had to admit at first was great! He wasn't giving me the third degree about whatever destruction I was causing, but now...his constitution was affecting all of us. Beta's temper was short, I was too tired to do perimeters, Delta was confused, and Gamma forgot how to do a knock knock joke- which at first was nice but now he just says 'Knock knock!' and walks away.

     "Fine." I dropped my head. "But I'll do it my way."  
There was alarm on her face as I brushed past her, but she never voiced her concern.  
If I was going to do something that made me feel dirty...I was going to have fun doing it.

I grabbed a rope and began to make my way into Alpha's domain. He's been holed up like a gopher for almost a month now. Thank whatever deity that we didn't need bathing habits like humans.  
My shadow engulfed his doorway. His voice was sharp, but he never looked my way. "What do you want?"  
Walking in, I wrapped the rope around his midsection. He looked up at me confused from his seat by the open holo windows. There had to be thirty of the damn things lighting his room in the pale blue light, highlighting his annoyed face.

I walked back out to my rocket launcher waiting for me. Rope secured, I looked down the long hall. Sucking air between my teeth I squeezed the trigger and watched the line go. I put a hand over my eyes, pretending to block the sun out of my eyes as a screech came whizzing by me.

The rocket shot off down the longest hallway with Alpha's screeching body attached to it. He crashed through the poker table scattering card in his wake to Sigma's dismay. The cards in his hands puffed in flames as he narrowed his eyes at me. Gamma absent mindedly placed a card down where the table would have been and yelled "Go fish!" as it fluttered to the floor.

I felt more then seen the aura coming from my left. Beta's rage was potent and I was getting kind of jealous. I only got that mad when she was killed and I took out that base of sim troopers.  
I should send an 'I'm sorry for you loss' card or something.  
     "Omega!"  
Huffing, "I know princess, I'm an asshole and I'll go get him. Epsilon lived through it, so will that twat muffin."  
     "I didn't live..." Epsilon looked up from his cards. "Is it too late to say yahtzee?"  
Sigma erupted in flames and walked off kicking anything in his path.  
My glare narrowed, "What do you mean you didn't live?"  
With a short cough he handed his cards to Gamma who complained there were no 'Draw Four's'. "I mean...I was in a simulation and I died and reset the simulation to try again. Only an idiot would tie himself to a rocket launcher-" He choked on the next words at I smacked the back of his head.  
     "For memory you sure forget the important parts!"  
Something slammed in the back of my head and kicked the back of my knee for good measure. "For anger, you sure are a dumbass!"  
     "Hey! Blind rage can do some stupid fucking things cupcake! You wanted him out of the room and I made it happen!"

She continued to kick me till she calmed down a little. "Just get him back. We literally cannot live without that bastard!" Her voice wavered a little as her color flickered.  
Fuck me...just fuck me sideways right up the 1's and 0's.

I grabbed Epsilon by his hilarious 'Insert Memory Here' shirt and dragged him down the hall with me.  
     "Hey! Why do I have to go?"  
     "Because it was your idea genius."  
He huffed and formed his armor and trailed behind me as I made my way through the hall noting the scratches and dents along the floor and walls. Theta would have loved to try this, granted he would know what was happening and brace for it.

Clearing his throat, "I think she is mad because she expects more out of you."  
     "No kidding Freud. I'm the fucking AI babysitter apparently. Oh no! Something fucked up! Get Omega! Oh shit! Gamma did that 'pull my finger' joke and blew up Sigma again! Get Omega!" I felt the fire of anger licking at my senses. The purple haze of rage swirled in front of me as I stopped to gather myself.  
Usually, this stuff didn't bother me. Being needed was nicer than being treated as a pariah for following Sigma as he preached 'The Good Word of Alpha'.  
Boy were we surprised when that it was so not worth it.  
Epsilon muttered an apology as we started walking again.

We traveled in silence, neither of us not knowing what to say to break the ice. My outburst pretty much killed the mood. As I opened my mouth to try to save the situation, we came to the end of the hall and no sign of Alpha.  
     "Left or right?"  
Epsilon looked up and down the walls, "There are scratches down both halls." He touched the wall and did what any idiot would do. "Hey! Alpha! You alive?"

A minute of silence was broken with a slight nasally whine. "I'm on this plane of existence against my will!"  
I snorted. "Sorry about that Alpha...I'll try harder next time!" I felt his disdain as he cursed Sigma, Gamma and me for his predicament.  
I knew we were his favorite kids.

Grunting, we followed his barrage of curses and threats when he got down. The closer we got, the harder it was not to laugh.  
Hanging from the ceiling like a murderous Tinker Bell caught in a snare, Alpha was dangling above a pile of coiled wires left haphazardly by humans after they finished this side of the server. His arms crossed, he was spinning in a slow circle and pulsating in an angry white light.  
     "You assholes going to stand there or get me down?"  
Shrugging, "Rock, paper, scissors for it?"  
Alpha began to struggle, turning himself into a glow in the dark pendulum. "Seriously! Get me down!"  
Epsilon won with paper and began to line up the shot.  
     "Nononono! Wait! He's a worse shot than me!"

That would be the understatement of the century.  
The shot went wide, ricocheting off of walls till it settled on a target. And as you know it, it was my hip. I turned to give Epsilon a glare as he held his hands up in defense and placate my anger.  
     "Seriously, you are now demoted to under the kids."  
Alpha went from fear and terror to laughing hysterically as Epsilon whined.  
     "And you! You can fuck off too!" I pulled my knife and threw it at the rope, severing the line that held Alpha suspended. He fell into the wires and rolled halfway down, getting snagged and caught before settling on the floor.  
After helping him up, he grumbled which I think was a 'thanks' but I'm pretty sure it could have also been 'fuck off'.  
You never know.

After a few minutes of wrangling stray cords and cutting the rest of the rope off, Alpha cleared his throat and began his attempt of the Beta Death Glare of Doom. Tell you the truth, it was merely lukewarm at best, Eta does a way better job than him. Iota's looks manic because she can't stop smiling to look menacing but instead looks insane which in turn gets the job done.  
  
     "So what the fuck is up with you assholes?"  
I throw my head back, pull it forward and then pop the joint. "We are deteriorating because you are hiding away like a hermit." I crack the other side with a sigh.  
     "What do you mean 'deteriorating'? You all look fine to me."  
     "How do we look fine when you haven't seen us unless we hunt you down?! Delta isn't functioning, Eta and Iota are shrinking, Theta is listless, Gamma can't complete a joke, and Epsilon- what day is today?"  
He looked up when I said he name. "Oh, um green. No! Purple...feels purple today."  
I give Alpha the 'See what I mean!' look only to have him scoff and blow me off. "And Beta dropped a cup size!"  
     "Well goddamn! This is more serious than I thought!"  
  
I pinch the bridge of my nose and groan. Can a memory fragment out of an artificial intelligence get a headache? Because I fucking do right now. "How is it that I'm a fragment of your anger and yet you are still an angry pissy asshole?"  
     "Oh! I know this one!" Epsilon jumped between us. "You're actually a fragment of rage of the loss of Allison. That's why you went on a killing spree when Beta was killed when most of the time you were just an annoying nuisance." He shrugged.  
     "Nuisance?!" What a cockbite!  
Alpha laughed and pointed with no diplomacy on his side. Granted, that was probably fractured when Delta was made.  
     "If you really think about it, Eta and Iota are so small because the Director really didn't have many fears or was pretty much devoid of happiness. Theta got screwed over too because again- he had trust issues by the time he made Alpha." Epsilon was sounding more like himself, full of information with a side of snark.  
     "So, if what you say is right then me getting Eta out of her comfort zone, making Iota happy, and giving Theta my trust was helping them grow..."  
     "Yeah, and the king of prolapsed assholes mucked it up and now they are shrinking again."  
     "Hey! I don't like your tone...assface"  
Epsilon grumbled, "I wish sis was here, she would help. You two are like dealing with Grif and Tucker over the use of the only internet connection."  
I looked over at him as he cast his sullen face to the floor. "Care to remind us who you're talking about? Memory?" I tapped his head.  
     "Carolina! You know! Wait...you don't do you?"  
Alpha stopped in place, "Know what?"  
Taking a deep breath, "She was Allison and the Director's daughter."  
That earned a high pitched screech from Alpha.

I was pretty much stabbed in the heart. How many times did I try to get Texas to kill her and took advantage of her jealousy? Shit...I have been trying hard to not be the bad guy only to be reminded of the horrible shit I caused.  
We continued to our main living hall, Epsilon and Alpha loudly discussing whatever it was. All I heard was white noise at that moment.  
Skirting around the crowd coming towards us, I made my way to my little hole and locked myself in.

 

For once since my creation, I just wanted to be left alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long and kind of sad, which is a totally different course I was originally going with when I started these.


	5. Operation: Omega

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Omega experiences regret and feels everyone would be better off without him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a happy ending...do not fret.

Defragmenting wasn't as painful as I thought. Like falling asleep in a deep pool and the water slowly getting colder and colder as the world got quieter and quieter. The soothing whirring of the server's cooling fans converting into white noise.

vrrrr  
vrrrr  
vrrrr  
BANG  
vrrrr  
vrrrr  
vrrrr  
BANG

Opening a bleary eye I glared at the spot the noise was coming from. Humans would liken it to a fly in the room as you are trying to fall asleep.  
The banging continued.  
  
Some assholes was knocking, knocking on my firewall.  
T'is some asshole, only this and nothing more.  
  
     "Go away!" My voice sounded raspy from a lack of bellowing.  
     "Open up dick muffin!" Of all the people I would have never guessed Alpha would be the one trying to get to me.  
  
I pushed the last of my power into the firewall only to see it glow bright white and the last person in the world I wanted to see walk through.  
Why couldn't he let me be?  
     "Look at you for fucks sakes." He slapped his hands down on his legs and sat down in front of me. "What the hell are you doing?"  
  
I probably looked the sight. Another day in my state and I would have probably disintegrated to the point of a Level 4 crash.  
     "Can't you just let me die in peace?"  
His laugh is forced, "Have you seen us? Peace? That's fucking rich." He snorted and toed my leg. "Seriously asshole, what are you doing? I always thought if you died, you would take me down with you in some weird suicide murder bullshit."  
  
Trying to get up from my spot, I slumped back down weakened from defragging and holding the firewall up to keep everyone out- which was working super well at the moment.  
     "Maybe I should kill you, one last act of mercy."  
     "Do it bitch! You can't even form a fist! I could take you out with a fart." He kicked my leg a little harder, shit eating grin on his face.  
  
I could feel a familiar tickle along my spine, warmth in the cold pool that I was melting into. The warmth began to lick down my limbs, burning now. Strength coiled as I opened and closed my hands, my body stood for the first time in weeks as I towered over Alpha as he squeaked.  
     "Hey! Welcome back!"  
  
Narrowing my eyes I picked him up by his shirt collar and drug him towards the firewall protecting me from the outside world. He dug his heels into the metal flooring but with rage powering me, Alpha was nothing more than a cursing feather on the wind in my hands. Opening a small hole in the glowing door, I kicked him in the ass and watched him tumble down the hall cursing.  
  
With renewed strength, I pushed it all into locking the firewall further only to hear him walk through as I turned my back.  
     "I'm the Alpha dipshit! I can pick any of your locks."  
Defeated, I sit back down in my corner. "You would make York so proud."  
  
Sitting back down in front of me, "I'll tell you something, Delta used to set off the alarms to keep York humble. Such an asshole." He tapped my knee with his foot again. Alpha seemed to be dead set on annoying the fuck out of me.  
     "What do you want?"  
     "I want you out there keeping the kids out of my hair and making sure the Church of Meta doesn't fucking rise up again. Without you keeping Tweedle Numb Nuts and Tweedle Dick Face in line...they are plotting something."  
     "I can't." Dropping my head down in defeat he kicked me again harder this time.  
     "The fuck you can't! You! You fucking cockroach! You zit on the ass of life! Don't give me that bullshit!" He groaned and wiped his hands down his face muttering under his breath.  
     "After all the shit I have done, the murder and the rampage...I tried to kill Carolina for fun...our kid!"  
  
Alpha sat and digested my outburst and began to laugh. "Jesus dude! That was so fucking gay!"  
  
That was not the response I was expecting.  
  
     "Of all the assholes that need to up and disappear, you are like number four on my list...a high four, but still. I...nee....I...neeee" He began to cough.  
     "Who's the gay one now asshole. You need me?" A smirk found my lips.  
  
He grunted, which would be the only response I would get out of him.  
  
Alpha did care.  
Well, fuck me up the 1's and 0's.  
  
Dropping the firewall and pulling the energy back into myself, I felt my vigor returning. Tentatively, Alpha got up and raised his hands in a defense posture. "So...you good?"  
     "No." I huffed and threw back my head and looked up at the wired ceiling. "I have regrets. Is that what it's like to feel human? Because it sucks. Is this what Sigma wanted? What a dick."

 

Walking out of my room for the first time in weeks, I noticed how dull everything was. The commons room was quiet.  
No Theta skateboarding, no Eta and Iota whispering in their little language while listening to music, no Beta trapezing along the wires, or even Delta trying to give a lecture to anyone who would listen.  
Nothing but Sigma and Gamma leaning into each other in a plotting manner that wouldn't normally fly on my watch.  
  
I slapped my hands on their shoulders, holding them close as I leaned in and whispered.  
     "What is my job here brothers?"  
Clearing his throat, I could see the flicker of flame in Sigma's eyes vanish as he turned to look at me. "That would be to keep everyone safe from the spiders and cockroaches." He smiled, but it was a nervous smile.  
  
Alpha was right, I was the only one to control these two from causing harm to our little heaven we had mapped out.  
Running circles with my thumbs, menacingly I might add; on their shoulders. "And here I took a nice nap and found out that there are cockroaches brooding close by." I dug deeper with my fingers making Gamma gasp and try to wriggle from my grasp. "I have to do something about it, don't I? It is my job...isn't it."  
Sigma winced, "Yes."  
I stood up straight and smacked them both on the back with an ominous grin on my face. "That's right bitches, daddy's back."

 

Standing in her doorway, Beta cocked an eyebrow in my direction. "Well, look who stopped being a little bitch."  
     "Miss me sugar poots?"  
  
She crossed her arms and huffed, "It's boring without you clomping around like you rule the place."  
I pinched Beta's cheeks and began to pull on them, "Daw! You did miss me!"  
  
Hissing and smacking my hands away, "What the fuck did he do to you?"  
     "He tried to do some sick bonding shit with me. If I didn't get my shit together, I swear on my code he would have cuddled me." I shuddered. "Please tell me there is something to kill. I need to wash off the smell of Alpha off of me with some blood."  
     "Theta spotted some spiders down the corridor around server 2...your favorite spot." She punched my shoulder- not lightly, because she isn't the lightly punch you kind of lady; but with enough force that I stepped back with a large grin on my face.  
  
She was happy to see me. It warmed the cockles of my code.

  
  
There was scuffling of feet behind me as my hunting party arrived. Their eyes were bright awaiting my instructions.  
     "Well, don't just stand there! Gear up kiddos! We're going to server 2 for some spiders!"  
  
Theta whooped as he scrambled to lift the sniper rifle. It would take some time and dedication to get him back to his larger form, but I couldn't tell him to put it back for something more his size. Eta and Iota climbed up my shoulders to their favorite perch, it was a familiar weight that I didn't know I missed so much.

After checking the weapons, I saw a small blue glimmer off to the side. I snorted, "C'mon out Epsilon."  
His movements were unsure and slow, "I'm sorry...it was my fault."  
  
Sighing, I looked down the barrel of the gun noting how clean it was. That earned Theta a ruffling of his hair as he gave me a face splitting grin.  
     "It wasn't your fault. You're not the one to let me have free reign of terror when we were free."  
     "But-"  
  
Looking over towards him, "Are you going to help us kill shit-" I felt the familiar tug on my ear and the slight menacing hum of Eta and the snorty giggle of Iota. Taking in a deep breath, "Are you going to help us kill some SPIDERS or you going to be the next one Alpha has to dig out of their hole?" Snapping the mag in its chamber was soothing.  
  
Familiar.  
  
     "I'll help." He gave a weary grin and donned his gear.  
Nodding once, "Alright kiddos, tell uncle Epsilon the first rule of Spider Club!"  
In unison, "Never shoot Omega in the-" They stopped, their codes whirling around in their heads.  
Scrunching her freckled nose, Eta spat it out. "Ass!"  
  
I barked out a laugh and tapped her knee in mirth.  
  
That's why she's my fucking favorite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tumblr: anger-management-omega
> 
> facebook: angermanagementomega


End file.
